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The household saying “ Think before you speak” is a timeless classic that never gets old. What might seem pretty unpretentious to you might leave others boiling in rage. This is often the case with women, in particular, who aren’t always the ones to talk it on the chin.
Men need to understand that women are more sensitive to lots of things than one might think. It is easy to infuriate a woman and make her go nuts by uttering a few words that do not go well with her. Every man would have come across age-old sermons about what to and what not to say to a girl, especially when it comes to their age and weight. But there is something more to that. It is not always about age and weight.
If there is anything that every man should open their eyes to, it is best not to say anything at all sometimes. Better than driving a woman mad or getting a solid old-fashioned whack, right?
Therefore, in this article, we will try to explore various questions that a man should avoid asking a woman.
Questions you should avoid asking a woman
Men should be wary while they question a woman because not everything might go down well with her.
The following are 10 interrogatory statements that you should avoid while engaged in a conversation with a woman:
1. You look cranky. Are you on your period?
While many men believe that asking a girl about her period is a way to show that you understand what she is going through, there is a way to ask her if you genuinely do care about her. Presuming that someone is on her period based on strange behavior or outlook is the worst possible way out of all.
It's disrespectful and sexist to assume that women's female reproductive systems cause them to act unreasonably. Additionally, it stirs up the same antiquated ideas that have historically restricted women.
Remember that women are doomed to quick mood swings, excruciating cramps, bloating, and discomfort for five to seven days. The last thing she needs, while they're dealing with all of this and going about their everyday lives, is to encounter a guy who believes that her unusual appearance indicates that she's on her period.
2. Do you need to apply cosmetics on your face daily?
In a guy's view, it often appears that a girl turns to makeup products to hide how her face genuinely looks when in reality, this is not always the case. What guys don't get is that when a girl wears cosmetics, she isn't suggesting she doesn't like the way she looks "naturally." When it comes to her beauty routine, it all boils down to the individual and what makes her happy.
The reality is that most girls, if not all, wear makeup to gain control over their appearance, which inadvertently leads to improved confidence. They are less likely to be self-conscious or nervous about their looks when they believe we have control over how they look.
So what happens when a man questions a woman on her makeup routine? Not only does that dent her makeup but also makes her lash out at you. You do not want to mess with someone’s confidence parameter, don’t you?
3. Can you just be like how a girl should?
A guy calling out a girl and asking her to be like a girl has all the recipes of a disaster and spells trouble. So much so that he would be lucky to escape unscathed. By asking a girl to meet certain expectations, you are doing nothing but stereotyping her. Asking her to behave like how a girl is supposed to behave takes away the individuality factor and personality which often gets under the skin of girls who react immediately.
Keep in mind that every girl has the right to explore and define their own gender identity and expression without fear of being judged or pushed to conform to traditional gender roles. Men need to understand that every girl in the world prefers to be free to express themselves authentically rather than conform to societal norms.
4. Are you sure you want to wear this dress?
Questioning a woman on her attire is arguably the worst thing a man can do because women hate it. Why? Because it is her own choice. Remember that a woman's physical appearance is firmly brought into the forefront when she is asked why she doesn't have a more feminine style of dressing, which can be intrusive and judgmental. Nobody has the right to instruct a woman what to dress or question her dressing style. When it comes to their own body and the clothing they choose to wear, everyone has the freedom to make their own decisions.
Well, we as men have to put ourselves in the shoes of women and think about it. What if a woman questions your dressing sense? What if a woman asks to swap her jeans with cotton pants? You will have a go at her, won’t you? This is why you should not question a woman based on her attire because you will not like it when the reverse happens.
5. Are you still single?
Regardless of gender, questioning a person's relationship status can be a sensitive subject. A little more so when you do it to a woman. When you do not know what a girl is up to in her life and her private choices, but you still go on and blatantly question her relationship status, do not expect to get away just like that. She could well be going through a challenging period, or have just gone through breakups or other relationship difficulties and might need space.
Furthermore, asking a girl if she is single can be seen as expressing romantic interest for her. Well, that is the last thing you want to do when a girl is already going through relationship troubles. For men, it is important to understand that if you are genuinely interested in someone, you are better off engaging in a respectful and considerate conversation rather than directly inquiring about their marital status.
6. Why do you seem to look different today?
The statement “ You seem to look different today” is often confusing for the receiver because it lacks clear-cut precision. When a man says this to a woman, it typically indicates that she looks different now than when he last saw her. It could be outwardly visible such as changes in hair color, clothing style, or covertness like an aura of contentment brought on by professional success or grief brought on by a failed relationship.
But what if she has not changed in any way and no other has told that to her before? It won’t go down well with her then and might turn suspicious of the one who commented in the first place.
7. Why is your friend like this...(Laugh)?
Judging a random person on Outlook is not ok. It makes no difference whether it's your height, weight, skin tone, clothing, activities, or anything else. You should not evaluate a person based on their appearance because you do not have a clue about their life story.
When you go on to a girl you know and question her friend in a super judgmental way, then it will surely irritate her. The saying goes “ Appearances are truly deceptive”. As men, sometimes when we see individuals for the first time, we always form a judgment based on their appearances, even though the saying clearly warns us not to do so. At least try to understand that you are poking fun out of her friend who might be super important to her. It will affect both here and you do not want to be the reason for someone else's mood off.
8. Why can’t you respond to my messages?
A man should never inquire to her mate as to why she did not respond to his message because doing so would indicate that he was too transfixed in looking for the response and would also make her feel guilty. As they all say, there is a right way to ask anything to someone.
It's often more productive to express your feelings or concerns in a non-confrontational manner to her rather than asking why she hasn't responded. You could convey that you seem to think that she has not been in touch with you of late and ask her if everything is okay with her in a caring way. This is more respectful and one that promotes open dialogue.
9. Why do you get angry over everything like a small child?
Remember that anger is an instinctive reaction to powerlessness. You can be angry at someone or something else or most times angry at yourself. Many women do not believe they are being listened to, valued, appreciated, or supported.
This is when we as men have to be there to support them and not compare them to small children. By questioning women improperly, you will only make them even more irate. It does not do any help and you instead add fuel to the fire. Support rather than question a woman!
10. Do you even have anything to say? Why are you silent?
Well, this is one way of saying you are bored of the person right? Making such a remark is more likely to stifle rather than encourage communication. A woman will likely become defensive or withdraw from the conversation, making a productive discussion difficult, when she is on the receiving end of this question.
Instead what you should do is engage them or steer the conversation towards topics that both of you are interested in. Men! It is important to not piss off a woman.
Conclusion
The truth is that we as men have all unavoidably slipped up during a conversation at some point, which is one of the many unavoidable truths of being human. However, it's worth mentioning that, due to increased societal scrutiny, women are much too often the recipients of these embarrassing indiscretions.
One cannot deny that there is no better approach to getting to know someone than to ask thoughtful, insightful questions. But when men interact with women, the aforementioned questions cannot be directed at women because they might not go well with them. Be mindful of them and talk sensibly!
Written By - V. Sam Josh
Edited By - Bhagwat Jha